How to...

There are certain things in Motherhood and Wifehood that make you feel like a complete failure.  The fitted sheet has always been one of them. 

My Mother's sheets were always folded to perfection.  My Granny's sheets were always folded to perfection. 

Mine...not so much.

In fact, my dear friend Kenzi gave almost the perfect example of how we fold the fitted sheet here, when I told her I was watching a YouTube video to find out how to do it right.

"how to fold a fitted sheet?
really?
put on arms and roll one over the other
in a spinning motion" (Kenzi)

She then drove the point home with the fact that you are working out while you are "folding".  Thank you dear friend for that visual picture and laugh.

But that is the truth.  I have tried all different ways to fold them.  And nothing works.  So today...as I stared at my nemesis...I thought...

GOOGLE!

Why hadn't I thought of this before?  So I googled...

How to fold a fitted sheet

And VIOLA!!!

2 YouTube videos popped up right before my eyes.  You can imagine my excitement.  If I can figure this out...can you imagine what else I can do?  What else I can find on Google that will help me in my trials and tribulations?

So...I am adding a picture of my folded fitted sheets.  I watched the video and carefully reinacted every step.  Thus creating the perfect rectangle of a fitted sheet.  (Well...almost perfect.  They are jersey knit sheets and I am convinced they are not created in an equal rectangle to begin with.)  Compared the rolling, spinning fold...this is AWESOME.

In this excitement...I have created a list of things I'd like to learn regarding Motherhood and Wifehood.

How to do laundry without losing socks
(I mean really...where do those crazy things go?)

How to clean a bathroom without getting bleach spots on your clothes?
(I am guessing this will end with don't use bleach, or hire a housekeeper)

How to keep children from getting dirty?

How to keep kid's feet from smelling so bad, you think something might possibly have died in their shoes and socks?

How to get somewhere...anywhere...on time with everything and everyone you are supposed to be bringing?

How to get all the sunflower seeds out of the van?

How to keep yourself from drinking pop when it and coffee are quite possibly the ONLY things getting you through your day?

How to eat healthy and exercise when you have small children?  (I think this one will say something about dedication, schedule and will power...which leads to my next google search question...)

How (& where) to find dedication, schedule and will power?

How can I get rid of stretch marks, excess body weight and cellulite with little or no effort at all?

How to keep from making statements that you will have to suck back in with twice the power that you spewed them out like...
I will never have a dirty house
I will never get a call from the school about my child's behavior
I will never have to worry about money
My child will never say those words
I'll never get upset with a coach
I will never want to be away from my kids
I would never, in a million years, refer to my child as a brat, or a fallen angel
I will probably always have this metabolism
I will never drink diet pop
I will never ask google stupid questions..etc, etc, etc

Tomorrow's post will no doubt have absolutely none of the answers to these questions.  Dang it.

BUT I CAN NOW FOLD A FITTED SHEET!

Have a blessed day!
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