Sometimes I feel like I am meeting things in my life at surface level.
Meaning, I very rarely dig deep enough for it to impact my life...good or bad. I find that the busier we are, the harder it is for me to completely give of myself to any one thing. For instance, we've been crazy busy with sports this summer. Big and Middle have started weight lifting, football camps, basketball camps, 7 on 7 football (whatever that means), and they own their own mowing business. They too are meeting things at surface level...of this I am sure. I am not lifting weights or attending hours of camps, but I am what I like to define as "crazy busy" myself. Their actions reflect my leadership and it occurs to me that I'm not doing a very good job.
I am attending (occasionally) two workout classes, three times a week. Don't be too impressed. I made it one day this week. I am trying to take over the cheer coach position for the high school and believe it or not, that has a LOT of jobs. I am looking forward to the changes in my classroom, but I'm working weekly on implementing changes that will hopefully benefit not only my students, but my teaching experience as well. All while attending 1957 baseball games in one summer. (That is an extreme exaggeration-a.k.a.-hyperbole)
I know what you are thinking. Poor me...the teacher who has the summer off to be free and enjoy life. You are absolutely right. I have time off from work and for that I am so grateful. I'm not complaining. What I'm saying is that even though I'm not working, I'm very busy with life. The busier we are, the harder it is to truly give of yourself and go beyond surface level in anything you do.
Relationships can be that way as well. When I am going from place to place and from person to person trying to make everyone happy, I tend to hit only the basic points of conversation. How are you...how are things...are you enjoying Summer...etc. Conversations are just that. Surface level. I don't have time to dig deep and I know I can keep up with people via social media. I know what is happening because I look at Facebook and I scan Instagram, and I check twitter (even though I'm clueless about tweeting). Surely I know what is happening from all the social media postings...right?
Wrong.
If you don't take the time to nurture relationships...and projects...and your body and health, they'll fail. If you don't take care of the most important things and people in your life, they will become non-existent. You would think...at my age, I would already know this. I guess you could say, I've been reminded here lately of what is truly important.
Life is moving faster than I can keep up. Instead of chasing my tail and being surface level-y with people and things in my life, I'm trying to make a list of what and who needs more than what meets the eye.
1. God
2. Coach (husband)
3. Big, Middle, Little
4. Family
5. Friends
6. Health
7. Devotions
8. School and Cheer
I need to dig deep and allow myself to only say yes to things I can commit to beyond the surface. I want to give of myself completely to things and people who mean the most. What will this look like? I'm not sure. I just know that it's time.
Grab a shovel.
Have a blessed day! <3
Referee of 3
Referee of 3
Friday, June 26, 2015
Saturday, June 20, 2015
Changes
Being a human is hard.
I know this is a vague statement, but when I started writing, I wrote that being a woman was hard. And the truth of the matter is, it isn't just women that deal with issues in life. We all do. Men, Women, and children, all face issues that mold and shape us into who we are as people.
For the longest time, I guess I thought that we would hit this place where we become who we will forever be. I started thinking this when I was younger because of the things that defined me as a person. Music and cheer were my life when I was younger. I loved being in theater and being center stage. I loved the excitement of sports (even though I really had NO idea what was going on) and I loved being in front of the crowd with my friends. At that point in life, I remember thinking that I would either be a professional singer or a professional cheerleader. Or a dance mom. That was my life and those were my aspirations. As you can see...life took a bit of a turn with three boys.
When my own children were born, I can remember putting them in this "box" if you will...of what they would become. I knew from the moment they were two, three, five, eleven, and now thirteen...what they would become and what they would be like. I'm not sure why I thought who they were at three is who they would be at thirteen, but I did. As it turns out, they are very different now from who they were then.
As I look back, I am realizing that we aren't the same all of the time. I think we have personality types. I think we have likes and dislikes. But thankfully...we don't have to be stuck in this box of "who we are".
I once read that in a woman's life, her hair texture changes seven times. (This is paraphrased because my memory is awful) That means...every "so often", your hair that used to scrunch up cute with gel, won't curl anymore. And one morning, you wake up with what used to be straight hair, but now has a bit of a wave on one side. What used to be thick, might be thin. What used to be strong, might now be weak. Our bodies take a toll in motherhood and in life, and physically, our hair changes. This is random, but with all of my recent hair (and life) changes, I thought it might fit into this blog.
Life throws us curve balls every now and again and it changes us. I'm not who I was when I was 17. I'm not who I was when I was 27. I'm not even who I was last year anymore. Life changes us almost daily. The longer I live, the more I find out how often we change. I'm also being able to see how others change as well.
What is she talking about?
I promise...I'll get to the point soon.
As I looked in the mirror this morning as I was getting ready, I realized that I've been through some pretty big changes this year. Some good. Some AMAZING. Some difficult. However...I'm not the person I was when I started going through these changes. I'm different. And that is completely okay. It is okay to do something out of your comfort zone. It is okay to try something new. It is okay to try something and realize it wasn't your best choice. And...it's OKAY to forgive people who also change in our lives. We sometimes get so wrapped up in ourselves, that we forget that others are living life and making changes as well. We need to be more accepting of our life changes, and sensitive to those of others. We all change and that is just part of life.
Children whose life I influence...this is for you.
It is okay to be who you are. Be true to yourself. But know that in this life, you'll go through many changes and you may not be who you were yesterday due to things that happen within and out of our control. We live...we learn...we become better people. AND...those who truly love you as God intends...will continue you to love you no matter who and what you become. (or what your hair looks like) :)
Now...after a week of cheerleader awesomeness...I am off to my regular life of baseball. Have a blessed day.
Referee of 3 (+ 1 coach, 22 students, and 16 cheerleaders)
I know this is a vague statement, but when I started writing, I wrote that being a woman was hard. And the truth of the matter is, it isn't just women that deal with issues in life. We all do. Men, Women, and children, all face issues that mold and shape us into who we are as people.
For the longest time, I guess I thought that we would hit this place where we become who we will forever be. I started thinking this when I was younger because of the things that defined me as a person. Music and cheer were my life when I was younger. I loved being in theater and being center stage. I loved the excitement of sports (even though I really had NO idea what was going on) and I loved being in front of the crowd with my friends. At that point in life, I remember thinking that I would either be a professional singer or a professional cheerleader. Or a dance mom. That was my life and those were my aspirations. As you can see...life took a bit of a turn with three boys.
When my own children were born, I can remember putting them in this "box" if you will...of what they would become. I knew from the moment they were two, three, five, eleven, and now thirteen...what they would become and what they would be like. I'm not sure why I thought who they were at three is who they would be at thirteen, but I did. As it turns out, they are very different now from who they were then.
As I look back, I am realizing that we aren't the same all of the time. I think we have personality types. I think we have likes and dislikes. But thankfully...we don't have to be stuck in this box of "who we are".
I once read that in a woman's life, her hair texture changes seven times. (This is paraphrased because my memory is awful) That means...every "so often", your hair that used to scrunch up cute with gel, won't curl anymore. And one morning, you wake up with what used to be straight hair, but now has a bit of a wave on one side. What used to be thick, might be thin. What used to be strong, might now be weak. Our bodies take a toll in motherhood and in life, and physically, our hair changes. This is random, but with all of my recent hair (and life) changes, I thought it might fit into this blog.
Life throws us curve balls every now and again and it changes us. I'm not who I was when I was 17. I'm not who I was when I was 27. I'm not even who I was last year anymore. Life changes us almost daily. The longer I live, the more I find out how often we change. I'm also being able to see how others change as well.
What is she talking about?
I promise...I'll get to the point soon.
As I looked in the mirror this morning as I was getting ready, I realized that I've been through some pretty big changes this year. Some good. Some AMAZING. Some difficult. However...I'm not the person I was when I started going through these changes. I'm different. And that is completely okay. It is okay to do something out of your comfort zone. It is okay to try something new. It is okay to try something and realize it wasn't your best choice. And...it's OKAY to forgive people who also change in our lives. We sometimes get so wrapped up in ourselves, that we forget that others are living life and making changes as well. We need to be more accepting of our life changes, and sensitive to those of others. We all change and that is just part of life.
Children whose life I influence...this is for you.
It is okay to be who you are. Be true to yourself. But know that in this life, you'll go through many changes and you may not be who you were yesterday due to things that happen within and out of our control. We live...we learn...we become better people. AND...those who truly love you as God intends...will continue you to love you no matter who and what you become. (or what your hair looks like) :)
Now...after a week of cheerleader awesomeness...I am off to my regular life of baseball. Have a blessed day.
Referee of 3 (+ 1 coach, 22 students, and 16 cheerleaders)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)