On the subject of cleaning...

When Big was a little guy, I can remember thinking...something is wrong with him.  He was what I kindly referred to as a "toddler monster" with more energy than a herd of wild boars.

(What?)

Stay with me.

At one of his well child check ups, I distinctly remember asking the doctor if he could be tested for an attention deficit disorder.  He was so full of energy...all the time...and I wasn't sure what to do about it.  I can remember the doctor smiling and telling me they don't test for anything of the sort until kids were a little older because ALL toddlers have a short attention span and can't stay focused on anything without distractions.

I think the same should be said about parents...specifically-moms.

I have the hardest time cleaning my house.  I don't know how to do it all at the same time.  I don't know how to tunnel vision myself to the finish line.  I always tell myself I'll get the house clean in a couple of hours if I just stay with it.

That is the issue.  The "stay with it" part.  I am quite certain I am missing the part of my brain that stays with anything for too long.  Cleaning is no exception.

I start in the bathroom...yesterday people...this was yesterday.  Today, I'm still not finished.  I really haven't advanced much past...the bathroom.  I did change our sheets, but in the process of changing the sheets, I realized I had laundry in both the washer and dryer.  (ALWAYS)  I re-started the wash and fluffed the clothes in the dryer.  However...about the second I shut the door, I forgot they were in there and you can bet your silly self, I was washing them again today.  Great googly moogly.

I did eventually finish the bathroom, but not all at once.  I had lunch with a friend...picked up a kid from drivers education, had a fight with my oldest, blogged in the bathroom that was almost clean, and THEN finished the bathroom.  I almost feel like I should throw myself a victory party.  That thought lasts until I get to the kitchen.  Darn it.

I start cleaning the kitchen, but have to put things away from the counters.  I find a package of light bulbs that I bought because our room is half dark...so I decide I'll change the bulb really quick.  From there, I take the old bulbs to the trash that is full...so I decide I'll take out the trash.  When I'm outside at the trash can, I notice I haven't watered my flowers...so I water the flowers.  As I'm watering the flowers, I remember that I was trying to clean the kitchen so I head back to the kitchen.  On the way I notice that Wrigs has a bit of a rash on her belly and think...she should have a bath.  Back to the clean bathroom we go.

Do you see what I mean?  The kitchen STILL ISN'T CLEAN friends.  Cabinet doors are wide open.  The dishwasher is fully unloaded, but only partially loaded...all because I saw a pack of light bulbs.

I am incapable of finishing this daunting task of cleaning the whole house.

So...I've decided to chunk the work like I do assignments for my students.  I'll chunk it and make a list of things I can do a little at a time.  Fingers and toes crossed that this works and I'll have the house clean by Friday.

As I'm chunking the cleaning list I start thinking about the word chunks...and it makes me think of chunky chocolate chip ice cream.  So...naturally, I head to the store.

Squirrel...
Referee of 3

Just a couple of things....

Hi all.  I know-it's been awhile.  I've been really busy trying to find my kitchen and attending baseball tournaments.  I have an amazing front tan and my kitchen counter is stacked with dishes and anything we are trying to keep from our lab, Wrigley.

I must warn you...this is a post about real life.  I've recently discovered that it is hard.

H-A-R-D.

I'm frustrated and currently sitting on the bathroom floor eating cookie dough and drinking a large water from sonic.  Yes...water.  I wanted a diet coke, but I was afraid I'd go in to sugar shock in my fragile state and I didn't want anyone to get hurt.

Lord have mercy...life can be hard.


Swimsuits-

Swimsuit shopping is dumb.  Actually...swimsuits are dumb.  Why can't we just swim in t-shirts and shorts?  Why did swimsuits become so "body showy" and stuff?  Why do we have to lower ourselves every year to a moment on a dressing room floor laughing so hard you have tears because you need a new top to give you the courage to get on a pool chair or floatie?  WHY?  Why do stretch marks exist?  What is cellulite and was God mad at me when he made my legs?  I mean...come on?  I've been running and I think the only thing it did was make some of those sweet dimples roll around to the front side of my legs.  WHAT IN THE WORLD?

Teenagers-

I love my children.  More than my own life.  But I don't understand what happens when they reach a certain age.  Do they stop thinking with their brains?  Do they lose brain cells when they sleep?  Why can't they be considerate of our feelings?  Why are all of our rules dumb and how did they become so smart?  They know everything and I am apparently a walking idiot who lives to make their lives miserable because I ask them to take out the trash and respond to text messages.  Why is it okay to have whole uneaten slices of pizza on plates in your room for days?  What is it exactly that keeps them from finishing milk in cups and taking the cups to the kitchen?  Their days are filled with snapping and selfies and NOT listening to their parents.  FOR THE LOVE!!!


Friends-

I am so thankful for my friends.  The older you get, the more you need good friends.  The kind that will take your tornado of a life and embrace it with you.  They know that your pictures on social media are the highlight reel and they understand why you don't post the bad stuff.  They know about it all...they pray for you...they talk you through it with cookie dough, cupcakes, coffee and wine...and they love you anyway. (They also never refer to the above said cookie dough, cupcake, coffee and wine when they are on the floor of the swimsuit dressing room as you curse your cellulite) Whenever I think I'm in a bad place and that we are abnormal, God brings me to a conversation with one of my best friends that helps me see how VERY NORMAL WE ALL ARE.  Let me tell you friends...if you think you are alone in these battles (swimsuit, teenager, marriage issues, etc.) you are not.  Do you hear me?  YOU ARE NOT ALONE.  We are all in this together.  None of us are all squeaky clean, happy families without the occasional blow up.  VERY FEW of us have our houses party ready at all times.  EVEN FEWER of us look amazing in a swimsuit and even those who do, doubt themselves.  We all struggle in so many ways and if we didn't have each other to fall on...not lean, but FALL on...we'd be in big trouble.  We are happy, sad, and angry.  We are hurting, healing, and learning constantly how to deal with the place we are in life.  We are right, wrong, and confused.  We are sensitive, tough, and somewhere in between.  We love, hate, and forgive.  We laugh, cry, and sometimes just feel numb.  We are human and these things are all very normal.  I once saw an article about the difference between empathy and sympathy.  Sympathy is being sorry for someone who is in a bad place.  Maybe even saying sorry and giving them a pep talk about all the great things present in life.  But empathy...empathy is where it's at.  Empathy is getting in the trenches with people.  Empathy says...be whatever...whoever you are and I'm here with you in whatever place you're in.  Because I love you that much.

Maybe...life isn't as hard as it sometimes seems.

Maybe...I'll put down the cookie dough and go talk to my teenagers.

Maybe...I'll even call my Mom and apologize to her for my teenage years.

If you've ever had a moment like this...and you've sat in your closet eating cookie dough and trying to figure your next strategic move with a teenager...punch in.

Thanks for keeping it real with me-
Referee of 3