That awkward moment when...

That awkward moment when.  I've seen this phrase on facebook many times.  I've heard people say it in conversation.  But not until today, did I fully understand the meaning.  I had that awkward moment today...and flashed back to an awkward moment of my past.  I will warn you.  This has to do with an appointment at the Dr. and a gown.  That is your warning.  Read the rest at your own risk.

I had an appointment this afternoon where I was asked to remove my clothing and put on a gown.  Well two gowns.  One for the top and one for the bottom.  Oh how I love the moments of complete and total humility at the Dr.'s office.  The fear that the door will open at any given second as you stand there trying to get un-and-re-dressed before anyone sees what has become of your body. 

I made it.  However...before my sweet nurse left the room, she instructed me that the top half of my gown was to tie in the front. 
Perfect, I thought.  I have always wondered how those stupid things go on and now she told me.  I will not look like an idiot.  I will have the gown on correctly and will appear to know exactly what I am doing.  And then I saw it.  There were two sides to this garment.  One that opened and one that was closed.  And the ties were on the side.  One on each side.  So they could tie to the front or to the back.  And I didn't know which was the front and which was the back.

GREAT.

I have a 50/50 chance of screwing this up.  Either they are going to walk in and see I have the garment on backwards, or they will think I have it together.  Which will it be...what do I do?  Does it tie in the back?  Why would it tie in the back.  Well...other gowns that have failed me in the past, (part II of this story) tied in the back.  But maybe this one ties in the front like a robe?  ACK!  Time is ticking away and I am still not dressed!  I was sweating.  And worrying.  And there was absolutely no food in my purse.  Not that I would have eaten it anyway as I had just stepped off the scale. 

So.  I held the gown in my hands and decided to try to make sense of the it.  I finally tied it on like a robe and sat down with confidence.  When the Dr. walked in, I smiled and said...

Is this thing on right?

It was.  And I still looked like an idiot for asking. 

Oh well. 

That awkward moment when you don't know which way the gown goes in the Dr.'s office. 

Part II

When my Little was born, I was in heaven.  I loved him from the moment I first saw him.  He was precious and gorgeous...and four weeks too early.  So upon arrival, they whisked him off to NICU for observation.  After gathering myself and having a cup of coffee, I decided to go down and visit my sweet, newborn son in the NICU. 

A little background.  I got to the hospital in time to get an epidural and the little darling was born.  So the epidural lasted 12 hours longer than the 15 minute birth.  Okay...that is an exaggeration, but this is my story.  Anyhoo...the kind nurse put me in my wheel chair and away we went.  Upon arriving in the NICU and laying eyes on my precious baby boy...another nurse came and asked me to lean forward in my wheelchair.  Sporting a real pretty hospital gown that TIED IN THE BACK, and after just giving birth, I wasn't wearing any undergarments...at all.  As the other nurse asked me to lean forward, she tucked a baby blanket into the back of the wheelchair and quietly whispered in my ear...

"Oh honey...your hiney was showing."

Oh really?  My HINEY WAS SHOWING?????  All the way down the hall?  I mean...I couldn't feel it because I was STILL NUMB FROM THE BIRTH! 

What is with me and those stupid gowns?  AAAAACCCCKKK?

That awkward moment when you realize...maybe it isn't the gown.  Maybe it is just you. 

Have a blessed day!
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