Were You There...

Were you there when they crucified my Lord?
Were you there when they crucified my Lord?
Oh! Sometimes it causes me to tremble, tremble,
tremble


Were you there when they crucified my Lord?

Were you there when they nailed him to the tree…

Were you there when they pierced him in the side...

Were you there when the sun refused to shine…

Were you there when they laid him in the tomb…


When I first came across Kyrie's story http://kyriethome.blogspot.com/2007/02/thank-you.html I found myself wondering...why are you so affected by this? You never knew Kyrie. You don't know her family. Why does your heart hurt so bad for them?

When one of my good friends Stephanie lost her beautiful daughter Lindsey, I did the same thing. I knew Stephanie very well, and I knew Lindsey...but there were moments of grief when I found myself hurting beyond my comprehension for their loss.

I have said before that I think that pain comes from carrying a little of their load of sadness.

It wasn't until a few years ago that I truly realized the meaning behind Good Friday. Coach and I have attended a handful of Good Friday services...and I can remember leaving them feeling so sad. But not a sadness that I couldn't shake off or eventually get over.

We rented the Passion of the Christ movie about four years ago. And let me tell you~I changed how I felt about Easter from that moment forward. The Bible tells the story of Jesus and his Crucifixion...but my mind would NEVER let me go to the depths it needed to understand what truly, truly happened that day.

Was I there when Kyrie lost her battle to cancer? No. Was I there when Stephanie realized that Lindsey had gone to be with God? No. Was I there when they nailed him to the cross...or pierced him in the side...or when they laid him to rest in the tomb? No. But it causes me to tremble. It causes me to cry and grieve and wonder, and worry and wonder some more. It causes me to grieve in ways that I don't even understand. Because my heart is becoming more like his. When we hurt, he hurts. When we cry, He cries. He holds us up...he washes our feet...he carries us in the sand.

And then I see...just a glimmer of hope. I see what the Kyrie Foundation is doing...and how God is working miracles right before our very eyes. And how He blessed Kyrie's family with two beautiful, healthy children.
I see how Stephanie has her smile back...and how God has been working miracles in her heart...repairing it so that she can be with Lindsey again in Heaven.
I see how after 14 years, Coach is healing after the loss of his Dad...so that he too can be with him in Heaven.
And I read the bible...the part that says...HE AROSE! HE AROSE! Hallelujah...Christ Arose! Because when we celebrate...He celebrates with us. As we get closer to Good Friday and Easter Sunday...allow yourself to grieve for our King. And then be prepared to celebrate like you've never celebrated before on Easter morning.

And ask yourself this question...will you be there when Jesus comes to call us home? YES YES YES!!!

Have a great day!
Amy

Go Kyrie Go

I wanted to take this opportunity to introduce any of you who don't already know, to the Kyrie Foundation.

I follow a blog called Kelly's Korner and each Friday she has a Show us your Life link. If you write a blog, you can write about what she uses for the topic and then link it to her blog for others to find and read. Today's Show us your Life topic is Show us your Life~Favorite Charities.

This one was easy for me. But why on a Christian Journey blog would someone write about a charity? Well for several reasons.

One~Because I believe in my heart that God brought me to the Foundation. He brought me to the cause, to new friends and to a life changing experience to say the least.

Two~Because I think that in HIS perfect timing, you'll be brought there too. If you have any desire to know more about this foundation, I encourage you to start from the beginning and read the whole story.

Three~Because I believe through the power of God and his touch, others can learn about Kyrie and her purpose. Her place on this earth was bigger than anything I could have imagined...and she was 19 months old when she earned her wings. She is working miracles by Jesus' side and I am proud to be a part of something that I feel is truly important.

Kyrie Dawn Thome was diagnosed with a rare form of Pediatric Brain Cancer when she was 17 months old. She was a very normal little girl. All of a sudden, Kyrie started falling down. She had been walking/running for quite awhile so this startled her parents. They took her to the Dr. and came home with medicine for an ear infection. Seems simple enough. But in the next few days, her condition worsened. She could no longer stand up. From there, the nightmare began. You can read the whole story on the blog at http://kyriethome.blogspot.com/2007/02/thank-you.html

Nine weeks. Nine weeks later, Kyrie was called Home. They were sent home from the hospital with pain medication to keep her comfortable. Kyrie passed away in her Mommy's arms. It is painful to even type those words...I can't imagine living it.

Kyrie's Aunt Megan and Uncle Chad started the foundation shortly after Kyrie's death to raise awareness and money for research and to someday find a cure. The Kyrie Foundation has done multiple fundraisers and just recently raised $50,000 which they used to purchase a grant in Kyrie's Memory. The grant will hopefully help the PBTF fund a tissue bank for research purposes. (Lord, we are so thankful)

This Foundation is doing BIG things. A little girl. A Big disease. A Big dream. A Big purpose. An Even Bigger God. My God...so thankful!





Lord, you have blessed me with so much by allowing me to be a part of this. Touch those who you believe will benefit from this information and it is my hope that they will not only help in finding a cure for Pediatric Brain Cancer, but they will find the ultimate prize Lord...you. Amen

Have an AWESOME FRIDAY!!!

Amy

In Need

Your name is Jesus
Your name is Jesus
You're the wonderful counselor
and my friend

You're what I hold onto
I know that you brought me through
All the days of loss
To the cross you knew
I need a Savior

I had a conversation with a friend yesterday that really brought me to my knees. It was a good talk...with a lot of questions. Questions that I couldn't fully answer. Questions that made me stop...think...wonder...worry...and then pray.

One of the things that she asked me was why when we grow closer to God do bad things still seem to happen? Not only still...but they happen even more? My answer was that when we grow closer in our relationship with Christ...Satan tries even harder to break that bond. He fits into the smallest of cracks in our lives to create problems...offer temptations...and turn us away from the Lord. She then asked me why he wouldn't protect us from that...hmmmm. I had nothing.

I emailed Pastor Rick and asked him for help with this one. I am faithful...no doubt. But I know when I have reached my limitations...I had to hand this one over to the big leagues. PR so graciously answered my request and I wanted you to read what he said.

"Protection doesn't necessarily mean "free from struggle". But it does mean God will never leave nor forsake. And the crazy thing is that we may give up on God but he never gives up on us."~Pastor Rick Just

Well okay...that makes sense. He is the peace that passes understanding. He is the calm...the moments of air that we get when we feel like we are drowning. He protects us in ways that we don't yet understand. But I told my friend that I have a feeling when we get to Heaven, he'll have a blueprint of our lives and it will all make sense.

The song that I started the post with is one that my friend Stephanie reminded me of. It is so true...Jesus...wonderful counselor and my friend. He is the one who gets us through the valley...he leads us through loss...he gives us salvation and he is our Savior. We need him more than even we know.

I suggested to my friend that she just get on her knees and give it all to God. And I think maybe the only thing we need to say is...Lord, I need you. I need a Savior.

Have a blessed day!
Amy

Rain Down

I am sitting here listening to the thunder and rain. Today has been one of those 'perspective' days. A lot has been said...a lot of things happened...and I am just sitting here soaking it all in. Trying to make sense of the senseless.



Let me explain.



Three years ago, we had some very dear friends lose their high school sons in a car accident. That was my first real brush with someone else's grief. It was unbearable. It was overwhelming. I had no idea what was to come.



A year later, another dear friend lost her daughter in a car accident. We were in her living room when she and her husband got home from the hospital. She came in and melted on the couch amongst friends. This was my second absolute face to face meeting with someone else's grief. There are not words to describe the emotions I had that day and have had ever since. I changed that morning sitting there with my friend.



Not five months later, I stumbled onto Kyrie's blog. I say stumbled but I mean I was guided there by the hand of God. It took me a couple of days to get through her story. It took me a couple of hours to get myself together after watching her memorial tribute. I will never forget watching it the first time. I dropped my lunch on the floor as it ended. The pain was so real. The hurt was so present...and I didn't even know them. I had no idea at the time that they lived just miles from me. I never knew Kyrie. Until I found the blog, I never knew her parents either. After reading her story, a series of unexplainable events led me to develop a friendship with Kyrie's family and some of the board member for the foundation. I was changed that day and have been different ever since.



All three of these stories...all three of these losses...changed me. I have used the phrase on the outside looking in before. That is how it felt. I felt like I was on the outside of a window into their grief. The kind of grief that takes your breath away. The kind of grief that stops you dead in your tracks. The kind of grief that makes you want to shout WHY GOD, WHY? (Not in comparison to the families grief)



So I asked him...Why would you do this? Why would you take someone's only child? Why would you give NO warning? Where were you when their tears were falling? Where were you when those little hands were in need? AND WHY ARE YOU PUTTING MY HEART IN THE DIRECT VIEW OF THEIR GRIEF? Why me God? What do you want from me?



Trust Daughter...Trust.



A friend asked me today why bad things seem to happen when we get close to God. I told her I thought it was because Satan works even harder to come between us when we are fully loving God. When he feels like that opening for him to come in and ruin our lives is closing...he works hard. He creates problems. He gives us temptations. Then she said...why doesn't God protect us from that? Well dear friend...I asked PR (Pastor Rick) about this is what he said.



"Protection doesn't necessarily mean "free from struggle". But it does mean God will never leave nor forsake. And the crazy thing is that we may give up on God but he never gives up on us."

~Pastor Rick Just



I feel like I was placed in the direct path of those three situations for this reason. To carry a little of their load. By hurting and crying and shouting and asking and crying some more...I carried just a fraction of their grief. I hurt for them. I prayed for them. I still pray for them. And as I said in today's earlier post...I continue tell their story.



Being in this path has made me realize the words to this song are more than true...



Didn't notice you were standing there

Didn't know that that was you holding me

Didn't know that you were crying too

Didn't know that that was you washing my feet...



He is there for all of us all the time. He is there when we think he is not. He is there when we don't want him to be. He is there when hurt. He is there when we cry...when we shout...when we question...and he is crying too. Because He never gives up on us.



Have a blessed day...

Amy

Tell the story

I love to tell the story of unseen things above,
Of Jesus and His glory, of Jesus and His love.
I love to tell the story, because I know ’tis true;
It satisfies my longings as nothing else can do.

I love to tell the story; ’tis pleasant to repeat
What seems, each time I tell it, more wonderfully sweet.
I love to tell the story, for some have never heard
The message of salvation from God’s own holy Word.

I was reading on another blog the other day and I read something I haven't been able to let go of. The blog that I am referring to is the 'Bring the Rain'. The writer of this blog lost a daughter shortly after birth. Their story is heart-breaking and amazing.

On her blog that day she was promoting a book that one of her friends had written. She then went on to tell him about the five most important words he'd ever written to her. She showed a picture of a card that said this...

I will tell your story.

The card had been placed in a basket the day of their daughter's funeral and she has had it hanging up in her house ever since.

http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/2010/02/matthews-new-book-hear-no-evil.html

Wow. All I could think about at the time was how important the Kyrie Foundation is to me. And how that is what I am wanting to do for them...tell her story. But as the day went on...I began to think about Jesus. His story.

This old hymn came to mind and I thought it was perfect for this post. I love to tell the story~twill be my theme in glory~to tell the old old story...of Jesus and his love.

Isn't that what we are doing? We love him. He loves us. He died a painful death...those words just don't even do his death justice. It was more than 'painful'...it was beyond comprehension...but he did it for us. All because of his love for us.

If we can do anything on this Earth to praise Him...it would be to tell his story. Because his story has brought millions and millions of people salvation. I am excited to think that all I have to do is tell people the story of his love and he'll do the rest. We can lead them to the water when they are thirsty...but we can't make them drink. But I know that I know that I know...that in His perfect timing, they'll drink.

Lord...I will tell your story.

Have a happy and blessed Wednesday!
Amy

In the thick of it

 

When I was little...back to pigtails little...I can remember going shopping with my Mom and sister. Chele and I would fight most of the way there because I would cross the imaginary line she had drawn down the middle of the back seat (on purpose) and Mom would swing her hand back behind her completely missing both of us. She drove a brown Caprice Classic...it was huge. I mean it was huge to the 5 & 6 year old who were ducking down in the back from her angry swinging hand...poor Mom.

Anyway, I can vividly remember walking through the store bored out of our minds. After we worked things out from my invasion of her territory in the car, we would hide under clothes racks and pretend they were our houses. Mom would yell at us to get out and we would just sit and giggle. She had no idea which ones we were under...and we thought we were hilarious.

But one time, Mom went to the register to pay and didn't tell us she was leaving. (The nerve) We popped out from below our circle rack clothing houses only to discover she was GONE. We couldn't see over the racks and racks of clothing to see she was only a few feet away. We thought she was gone forever. So what did we do? Well, Chele cried. She panicked and cried. I decided I would just get us out of the mess we were left in and I'd just get on the elevator to go and find our Mother. Doors open...walk in...doors close. When I got to the next floor...nothing looked familiar. So what did I do? I started crying of course. I had enough sense to hop back in the elevator and go back down...(thank goodness Sears only had 2 floors) I found Chele still searching. Eventually, we heard Mom's voice. "Girls? Are you ready to listen to me now? Or are we still going to play this game?" Uhm....we went running. We found her and when she saw the fear in our eyes, she realized we'd gotten ourselves lost. She hugged and then chewed us out for not listening...so typical.

Anyway, yesterday I was talking to my dear friend about another friend of ours and the difficulties she is facing in her life today. The phrase that we both used was 'in the thick of it'. Being lost in that sea of Sears' clothes...that is how we felt too. All we could see for miles and miles (from a 5 year old perspective) was clothing. I would imagine it is like that in a forest too. Miles and miles of trees. So thick you can't see the sunshine. So big, you lose track of which way you came in and which way you need to go. Chele and I tried to find our own way...and of course...mine got me worse off than I was to begin with...again...so typical. If we had just waited to hear Mom's voice, we would have known the direction to go.

If you are in the thick of it, I am praying for you. Try not to find your own way so much and listen...truly listen to the sound of his voice. If you walk in the direction HE is leading you...you'll hear the voice through the clothing...you'll see the light through the trees...you'll find HIM. You'll find that the happiness, the safety, the love you've been searching for is just a few steps ahead.

Song for today....These are the words I would say, Sidewalk Prophets

Be strong in the Lord and,
Never give up hope,
You're going to do great things,
I already know,
God's got His hand on you so,
Don't live life in fear,
Forgive and forget,
But don't forget why you're here,
Take your time and pray,
These are the words I would say,


Listen...truly listen to the chorus and Have a Wonderful Day!
Amy

Spotlight

I love to perform. I have loved performing since I was very young. I used to walk around the house doing commercials for my Family. My two favorites were..."I'm gonna wash that gray right outta my hair" and "ring around the collar". I could recite them word for word. My sister HATED my performing addiction...poor Chele.

From commercials I moved straight into singing at church. I think I sang my first solo at UMC at age 6? I immediately found my new love.

From church, I found myself singing in choirs through school and ended up being pretty involved in the school's theater department. I would have to say my all time favorite performance was...dare I say it...'Damn Yankees'. I was also involved in our school's show choir. Loved it. The singing...the dancing...the jazz hands. LOVED IT.

I decided to try out for a music scholarship at KU. Because I thought I was pretty great. Turns out...there are a lot of REALLY great...not just pretty great people out there who were trying out for the same scholarship. I went home that day a much smaller, much humbler fish. I ended up attending Emporia State University and let go of my music dreams about 2 semesters in.

I love American Idol. Had American Idol been around before the KU tryouts, I probably would have thought I was good enough to win the whole thing. I am thanking the Lord that the scholarship committee at KU was the my judging panel and not the entire nation. But what a rush that must be...standing up there singing for millions of people. And hearing their praise...and then their criticisms. Maybe not so great...I don't know.

I have learned so much in coming to Christ...but one thing I have completely learned is that He is who blessed me with my talent and He is the audience that I want to be listening. Music used to be my passion. Now praising Him with my voice is my passion.


To my audience of one
You are Father and you are son
As the spirit moves free
Let it find within me
A heart that beats to praise you

And now just to know you more
has become my great reward
to see your kingdom come
and your will be done
I only desire to be yours

Audience of one, Big Daddy Weave

As you go about your day today...think about what you do to praise him. How do you perform for him? What will your judgment be like? And try to live like he is the only one watching...desire to be His.

Have a great day!
Amy